So I figure it is time to post again even though I don't want to. I hate updating when I don't have anything good to say. And I really don't have anything good to say. But I figured you guys deserved an update. I have been binging like crazy and deserve the weight I have gained. However it is not going to continue! I hate the way I look! I hate the way I feel! And I most certainly hate that I am not good enough!
All I want in life is to be thin and happy. I can't be one without the other. It just doesn't work that way for us. And I hate that I always feel like no matter what I do I won't be good enough until I've lost 5 more pounds, 10, 20, 40, 80...... It's never enough but I'd be happy with 5 at a time.
In reality I know it will never be enough but at the same time I don't really care. I just want to be thin and frail. Beautiful.
This post has jumped around so much and yet I haven't really said anything of any value. So here is something of value. I plan on starting ABC on Wednesday. Now you might be asking why Wednesday and not tomorrow? Well my Mom is coming in tomorrow and I don't want to disappoint her so I figure another day of eating won't hurt considering what I have already done. Plus I have been really doing some serious cleaning in my room so soon I will have enough space to workout everyday.
One day I might be thin enough
for you to sweep me off my feet
but until that day
I will try harder then ever
to become your equal
to become someone worthy of you.
I want to be that girl
the one that takes your breath away
but only yours
cause I only have eyes for you.
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sounds like a good plan!! that will be great to be able to workout in your room! good luck with your mom and such.
ReplyDelete<3
Have fun with your mom!
ReplyDeleteCan't wait for you to jump on the ABC wagon! :P I know you can get back track and get skinny <33
ReplyDeleteWell I've got Christmas Fever right now so I'll be useless until around the 28th... but I am part of a tiny fledgling group that wants to do group fasts at the beginning of each month. We haven't done one yet. Wanna join? New year, new you?
ReplyDelete:D you're plan sounds great to me! don't be so dissapointed, you'll get better before you even know.
ReplyDeleteFrom: someone who knows what's she talking 'bout