So I realize I haven't been posting much or reading anyones blogs and I feel bad about that but I just don't have the time. I just don't even know what to say, I've been hurting so much lately. I've started cutting again, which scares me because I hadn't done it for years and now here I am back to square one. I just feel so useless, and helpless, and not good enough. I feel like I don't even deserve to live. Yet here I am. In a haze one night I carved "Not Perfect" into my left thigh, from just below my hip to just above me knee. It scares me but it comforts me.
I'm hoping to get myself a bit more together soon....
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you know we all accept you as you are. it's fine to say nothing when you have nothing to say. just give us a post once in a while so we know you're alright. i'm sorry you cut. it's only been a month or so since i have&it makes me nervous because this is usually as far as i get away from it. hang in there, babygirl. good luck in getting yourself more together soon but together or not you're beautiful.
ReplyDeletexoxo
zette
Poor lil one...hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteWhen I get really sad I put that into my workouts. Maybe you try that?
Pour all your sadness and depression into your weight loss. Do pushups until you're gonna drop. Leg lifts until you're too tired. Run run away from the sadness...drown it out with the pounding of your feet on the treadmill. My gym has this thing called a Jacob's Ladder ad I get on that and just climb until my sadness is lessened.
I have always used ana to cope with depression. Instead of cutting I starved. I burned calories....because that was one thing I would always own.